The Bubble Wrap Generation of Kids – A Time Magazine Exclusive

November 20, 2009 by Elizabeth Donovan, M. A.
Filed under All About You

By: Elizabeth Donovan, M.A.

winter walk

In the early 1990’s a drastic shift occurred in the way we parent our children. Safety no longer was a factor, it was a major factor in every move we made and every baby step our children took. Scrapes became ER visits and playing in the front yard became ‘banished to the playroom basement.’ Daily reports of children snatched off suburban streets and pedophiles hiding in the bushes overtook this nation and our reaction was swift and sure: protect our children at any price. What parents didn’t realize then, is that now there may be a hefty price tag for a generation of overly-parented kids.

“The insanity crept up on us slowly; we just wanted what was best for our kids. We bought macrobiotic cupcakes and hypoallergenic socks, hired tutors to correct a 5-year-old’s “pencil-holding deficiency,” hooked up broadband connections in the treehouse but took down the swing set after the second skinned knee. We hovered over every school, playground and practice field — “helicopter parents,” teachers christened us, a phenomenon that spread to parents of all ages, races and regions. Stores began marketing stove-knob covers and “Kinderkords” (also known as leashes; they allow “three full feet of freedom for both you and your child”) and Baby Kneepads (as if babies don’t come prepadded). The mayor of a Connecticut town agreed to chop down three hickory trees on one block after a woman worried that a stray nut might drop into her new swimming pool, where her nut-allergic grandson occasionally swam. Schools auctioned off the right to cut the carpool line and drop a child directly in front of the building — a spot that in other settings is known as handicapped parking.” –excerpt from “Can These Parents Be Saved” by author Nancy Gibbs for Time Magazine.

A new feature article from Time Magazine out on new stands Friday, Nov. 20, begs the question: Have parents inadvertently produced a generation of children who are over-parented? Certainly safety is a measurable concern when it comes to parenting our children, but perhaps we’ve gone too far. While the threat of stranger abductions and children being taken in the night looms in light of cases like Jaycee Dugard (who was snatched in front of her own father only to be found after 18 years in captivity). Parents hover over their children to the point of suffocation. As the Time Magazine article points out, overly-parenting our children only serves to produce kids who more naive, dependent, and are far less resilient.

Yet, as a mother of three, I do feel that there are boundaries we need to keep in place in order to both protect our children and allow them to grow and mature into healthy adults. I see nothing wrong with picking my daughters up at the bus stop or holding their hands in a crowded mall. I’ve occasionally been known to ‘hover’ over my young girls when I feel there is a potential threat, like not allowing them to go swimming without me there (they all are not avid swimmers yet). I believe that a little ‘bubble wrap’ is a good thing for our children, but too much can encroach on their self-esteem and self-worth. For example, a couple of years ago, in order for me to attend my then 3 year old’s preschool holiday party, I had to have a background check. Really? Since when did bringing Christmas cookies to your child’s party require parents to prove our innocence? I am fully aware that the purpose of these background checks is to keep predators out, but what happens when they prevent parents from getting in?

Despite the psychological implications of a generation of “Bubble Wrap Kids” the question remains what can we do as parents to ensure that our children are safe and strong without unrealistic inhibitions created by overly-protective parents? If you want the answer, be sure to check out Nancy Gibbs article in Time this week. It’s worth reading and reflecting on.