Talking to Your Daughter about the Economic Crisis

By: Mary Jo Rapini, LPC.

Many couples are struggling right now during this economic crisis and it seems like there is no end in sight. I was raised in a very poor family and I remember the “money arguments” my parents used to have. It affected me as a child. Children at this age are more insightful than adults give them credit for. They are very sensitive to seeing the main adults in their life upset or unhappy. They do not like marital discord and feel insecure when parents fight.

Children are happiest when parents sit with them and discuss what the family is dealing with and how everyone can help. A child often times feel like they are too little to help with “big issues”. But, a wise family understands the importance of everyone feeling responsible in a family. Your small daughter can understand what is going on (in 6 year old language) and how she can help. She needs to be empowered by you and your wife asking her what she feels she can do without in order to cut costs. She also needs to be complimented on her ability to help.

Tips that will help you talk with your six year old and use tough times as a great opportunity to bond!

1. After dinner the three of you sit down and come up with three things you can give up or quit spending on in the family.

2. Make a menu so you can begin to make meals at home instead of going out to eat (this will benefit your daughter as she will learn healthy foods as well as spend time with the two of you).

3. Set small realistic goals. For example your daughter can begin to do odd jobs around the house to earn money toward a family vacation or a new toy.

4. If you have increased anxiety or depression go to the doctor to assess your medical health as well as emotional. Ignoring a problem with depression or anger will not make it go away.

5. Learn a new coping mechanism. Instead of fighting maybe you and your wife can turn on music and dance to a song. Children love to see their parents happy with each other.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR:

Mary Jo Rapini, MEd, LPC, is a featured on TLC’s series, “Big Medicine”. Her monthly column, “NOTE TO SELF”, appears the third Monday of each month in the Health Section of the Houston Chronicle. She is also contributing three relationship tips a week via the Chronicle’s blog – http://blogs.chron.com/momhouston/. Rapini also writes the “Ask Mary Jo” column for Houston Family Magazine. She is also a contributing expert for Seventeen magazine (referenced twice in their 9/08 issue). She was quoted in an article about body image in First magazine (7/21/08).

She is an intimacy and sex counselor, and a certified anger management therapist. A mom with two daughters, her passion is helping all girls become strong women. Rapini is the author of Is God Pink? Dying to Heal and co-author of Start Talking: A Girl’s Guide for You and Your Mom About Health, Sex or Whatever. To read more about Mary Jo Rapini or purchase her books, visit Maryjorapini.com.

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